Care, Chaos, and Self-Care: Finding Strength in the Life of a Caregiver

Caregiving is one of those roles that sounds noble and meaningful and it is but it’s also exhausting, all-consuming, and sometimes heartbreaking. Over the last three episodes of Strength Happens, we’ve been exploring what it truly means to be a caregiver: the emotional rollercoaster, the impact on relationships, and the small but powerful steps toward self-care.

The Reality of Caregiving

Becoming a caregiver often happens suddenly, without warning. For Janine and I, it began the moment our daughters were born. There was no handbook, no time to prepare...just a quick detour in our parenting journey. Schedules now included doctors' appointments, therapy sessions, medication delivery...every thought, plan, and activity are centered around our children and their medical needs.

I have never considered being a medical momma a burden, rather I feel honored to walk through this path with each of my children, each having its own unique road it takes them. I also acknowledge that this level of caregiving can also be exhausting, overwhelming, and have a level of uncertainty that always keeps you on your toes. Some days feel like a storm rolling in fast, leaving you wondering how you’ll make it through another appointment, therapy session, or sleepless night.

It truly is a role that shapes your life, your heart, and your identity, and sometimes, it feels like it takes over all of who you are.

How Caregiving Impacts Relationships

The ripple effects of caregiving reach far beyond your own life. Marriages can shift into survival partnerships rather than romantic ones. Friendships can drift as your availability becomes limited. Siblings and extended family can feel distant or unsure how to help.

It can be isolating. But sharing these struggles openly reminds us that these feelings are normal and that we are human. Having honest conversations about caregiving helps us connect, find support, and even strengthen relationships when we least expect it.

Self-Care: Not Just a Buzzword

And then there’s self-care. Just saying the word can feel impossible when your days are filled with chaos, countless appointments and the everyday hustle and bustle that life brings. Who has time for spa days or long quiet walks when life feels like it’s moving at 100 miles an hour?

But the kind of self-care we need as caregivers isn’t indulgent ... it’s survival. It’s the small, practical, guilt-free steps that protect our well-being and keep us going. It could be five quiet minutes in the car, saying no to an extra obligation, asking for help, or leaning on a friend who truly understands. It’s putting yourself on the list, even when the world around you demands everything else.

Self-care is about remembering that you matter, not just as a caregiver, but as a human being. And when we honor that, we find the strength to keep showing up for the people we love.

Holding On and Finding Strength

Caregiving becomes part of our identity, but it doesn’t define all of who we are. There’s still room for joy, purpose, friendship, and rediscovering ourselves amidst the chaos. Strength happens in the real, messy middle in the moments when we choose to keep going, keep loving, and keep caring for ourselves too.

Over the past month, the Halle Grace Foundation has worked to develop a series of podcast episodes focused on the caregiver. Check out Strength Happens "Life of a Caregiver" series in season 1, episodes 7, 8, & 9 where we have real conversations about the challenges and the triumphs of caregiving, the importance of relationships, and the transformative power of self-care. Because in the middle of care and chaos, we find our true strength. Now streaming on Apple, Spotify, and Amazon Podcasts.